


Shenanigans and other weirdly wonderful stuff

by warblerjam



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Flirty Sans, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, No Plot/Plotless, Reader-Insert, Series of One Shots, at least trying to use, but in some chapters they may have a female body, i'll try to keep reader genderless
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-04-07
Packaged: 2018-05-27 22:22:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6302548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/warblerjam/pseuds/warblerjam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What's it like, to have two skeletons and co. in your life?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Being a disco ball is fine.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written fanfiction over ten years, not since those sad attempts to quench my thirst for Harry Potter when I was about 11.
> 
> Damn how time flies.
> 
> Now I'm trying to attempt something with Undertale.

"____, I think I have a bone to pick with you."

  
"Don't you mean you have a _bone-r_ for me to play with?"

  
You had never seen anyone change their color as fast as you saw Sans' face flush so brilliantly glowing blue that he could have passed as a skeleton shaped disco ball.

  
Interesting.

  
What on earth made you say something so bold?

Well.

  
Currently you were at skeleton brother's house, having your weekly movie night with them.

  
Those nights usually started with you arriving a bit before six, carrying snacks enough to feed an entire army and then someone would proceed choose a movie. But this time you hadn't had time to drop by your home to eat before leaving from your work at a local cafe - just before closing time a child had vomited all over the table he had been sitting, as well as decorating the area around it. Seriously, you couldn't believe how that cute pint-sized was able to produce such a nice vomit rainbow two metres ahead of him. _Where all that pressure came from?_ Nevertheless, hearing parents' endless stream of apologies, cleaning and closing the cafe had taken more time that usual so you had decided to head straight to Sans and Papyrus' home.

And of course the monster you called stomach had decided to make itself known because you thought it was a good idea to skip dinner. Half through the movie it had let out ungodly long growl leaving you and brothers speechless. Cheeks reddening you explained what had happened earlier that day, stuffing your mouth full of popcorn hoping it would be enough until you got home.

  
Papyrus wasn't having any of that. At first he had offered to make you some home-made spaghetti but you politely declined (last time he put so much garlic in sauce that it burned your mouth and you weren't ready for more of that any time soon), explaining that you really craved some chinese at the moment.

Their neighbours wouldn't probably appreciate some late evening cooking anyway since Papyrus tended to be a bit loud when making his favorite dish.

Then he insisted that since it had been your turn to pick a movie and after your glorious battle at the cafe, you deserved some good chow and he would go to get you something from nearby chinese restaurant. ' _Besides, it'll do only good to stretch my bones a bit_ ' he had concluded and left. You doubted waiving a mop around like crazy was anything but glorious, but you always had hard time refusing sweet skeleton's offers when he really wanted to help.  
You made a mental note to ask Papyrus to teach you how to make those puppy eyes later so you could try them out. For science of course.

And you were left alone with Sans. Sitting on sofa in the living room you two had chatted aimlessly a bit about this and that for a while but at some point you had started to trade jokes and puns (mostly Sans since you weren't that good at thinking them on spot) and somehow those jokes turned flirtier and flirtier, making you feel bolder than usual. You had a thing for Sans. And not just a thing but a big, heavy crush. You are not sure when you started to adore his smile more than plain friend should have or his deep laugh when you successfully told a pun (you even researched joke books!) or how he treated his little brother. You even found him chugging down ketchup attractive. When did eating condiments become hot?  
And that wish to have something more than friendship led to the present.

You could feel your sudden burst of courage to diminish when Sans just continued to stare incredulously at you, mouth slighty ajar. Fuck, did you offend him? Did you read signs you thought he had sent wrong and went overboard? You were sure he had been acting more open with you than before, touching you casually here and there and unless your hopeful feelings had messed up with your mind, you were sure he flirted with you quite often. But you had never tried to talk dirty to someone so you didn't really know how to play that game.

...Could skeletons even pop a boner?

**SHUT UP BRAIN.**

What had felt like a clever quip in your mind, felt now like a wrecking ball crushing down your feelings. Sweet mother of god, why did you say that?! You screamed internally, mortified. If Sans had joked about drenched panties, you wouldn't have taken it very well.

And after this you'd never say anything naughty again - you'll probably stop talking to anyone for a while - as mortification started to seep in, making you go stiff with nervousness.

  
This is why you usually stayed quiet, observing rather that talking because sometimes your mouth and brain didn't cooperate with each other and you'd be put in a spot just like the one right now. And you hated being in spot because in these kind of situations you'd freeze up, losing all your composure and rationality while your mind shuts down completely leaving you stuttering, sweating mess of a human - _did you already say you absolutely despised it?_ Especially if you tried to be smart or funny. Or in this case, a total creep.

Now he probably thought you're some gross thirsty pervert.

Not that you weren't but he didn't have to know it!

What a blow to your pride.

"Ah, um, I-... I mean-" Great. Now there was two disco balls "I didn't mean-.. No, I guess I meant but-..What I wanted to say is-.. Oh god damn it, I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have said anything like that! Is this considered as sexual harassment? I guess this is considered as sexual harassment.. I'm sorry, I don't know what came over-"

"Shh", was all Sans said as he put his phalanges gently over your mouth to make you shut up. A silence fell over you two and he removed his hand after being sure you were going to be quiet, observing your embarrassed, teary state with unreadable look on his face while you did your best looking at anywhere but him. Wow, was that a ketchup stain on the ceiling?

"Why did the proton blush?"

"Huh?" Eyebrows darting up in surprise you shifted your gaze from the stain to skeleton in front of you. But before you had chance to register what he had said, Sans continued

"It was positively attracted to the electron."

You stared at Sans for a whole minute before frowning in disbelief.

"Are you.. Are you making fun of me?" You couldn't stop hurt slipping in to you voice. Damn it. You were far too into your own awkwardness to register what Sans was really trying to do.

"NO! No. Please." His blush disappeared almost instantly when he paled - well, looked paler than usual - as he took in your saddened expression with panicky plead in his voice. "Look", he took a deep breath and sighed "I only meant that joke to calm you down but it obviously backfired." Glancing down he took your hands in his.

"I noticed." Blue glowing that had toned down earlier came back in full force, bringing few sweat drops along for the ride. Sans gulped, grasping your hands a bit tighter. "How you might be interested in me. Like a way before this evening. Reading people, observing them, is a thing I do all the time with everyone. But even so, well.."

Looking at your joined hands, his voice was barely above a whisper "I'm just Sans the flesh you know. I didn't dare to hope that you.."

"Shh." It was now your turn to sush at Sans. You were quiet for a moment before giving him a big, radiant smile which left him speechless. So beautiful. "Seriously Sans, you dork. We've been dancing around each other for how long and you think I don't find you charming? I even said that horrible pun because I'm in so deep."

"FYI, I'm totally down for you to play with me any way you want."

"Quiet, you." Scratch the disco ball. You'd put the nose of Rudolph in shame at this point. You took your hands from his to slap your cheeks slightly.

"First of all, let me clarify you one thing. I don't have some kind of weird skeleton/monster fetish. Not a chance. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Nada. For example when I look at Mettaton, I can't muster any kind of interest in him. All I can think of when looking at him is 'how he manages to keep his boots so shiny'-"

"I'd be worried if you were", Sans interrupted "I need my support against his ridiculous movies at our get-togethers."

"Let me finish, skeledude."

"How about Jerry?" He wiggled his eyebrow ridges.

"Okay, now you crossed the line." You scrunched your face in distaste. "How about no."

Sans snickered in considerably better mood, gentle affection evident in his eye sockets. You felt your throat go dry and coughed at the cutest face you had ever seen him make. You definitely had Sans fetish if anything.

"What I want to say is that your touch makes me feel so hot I could rival with Grillby who would lighten up the room more."

"What you want to say is that you like me."

"Sans."

"You want to hug me."

"Really now."

"You want to kiss me."

"Stop."

"You want to have s-"

You kissed him before he could complete his sentence.

Honestly, you didn't know what to expect when kissing a skeleton but any coherent thought evaporated in thin air as your mind went completely blank and you closed your eyes. His teeth felt smooth and warm and you could feel slightly tingling feeling teasing your lips. Was this his magic you felt? 'It feels so nice', you thought as you separated from him to breathe in only to lean in for more and this time Sans was ready as he put his right hand behind your head, massaging your scalp that sent delicious shivers down your spine.

For a while you peppered kisses to his teeth, jaw and any part on his face you felt you needed to show affection to before pulling back enough to look deep in his eyes.

"I was just gonna say that you want to have 'superb time and start a shockingly awesome sock collection with me'", Sans said breathlessly with his usual shit eating grin on place as he watched you through half-lidded eyes. You just groaned in response.

"Sure, why not. If we can name one Stripes and another Mr. Archibald."

"Deal."

You smiled at each other before leaning close for another kiss.

Sans brought his other hand to your mid-tight, giving light squeeze before resuming to do slow, lazy circle with his thumb. You felt excitement contracting your stomach, feeling entirely different hunger than earlier.

You wanted more, you wanted-

"I'M HOME! I HOPE I DIDN'T MAKE YOU WAIT TOO LONG!" Papyrus announced his presence in booming voice from the entry hall, shuffling about to get get his red boots off.

Jerking away from Sans in surprise, you managed to think how awkward this was going to be before reality started to twist around you and everything went black for a very brief moment.

And you found yourselves in Sans' room upstairs, sitting in the middle of his messy bed.

You looked each other, bewildered, Sans' hands resting on your hips where he had brought them in panic to blip you two away. It was just like from those typical scenes where mom surprises her kid smooching off with love interest but mom is replaced with Papyrus and no one got surprised, thanks to Sans' teleportation abilities. After a few seconds you snorted very unceremoniously and grinned at him.

"Well, that was.. Something." Thank god for Sans' quick reflexes. You really din't want to his brother to see you in this horny state you were in at the moment.

"Sometimes my bro has the most impeccable timing ever", Sans answered half sighing, half amused and squeezed your sides softly before releasing his grip. You already missed his touch but decided to keep your mouth shut. You didn't want to appear clingy. And Papyrus was at home too after all. But that thought didn't stop the feeling of wanting to push Sans down and make him gasp and moan your name.

Down, _____, down. Behaving bad won't end up in getting you any rewards.

Sensing your disappointment he glanced at you briefly before leaning over and giving a light nibble to your neck, breathing 'later' in low voice in your ear. You watched him wide-eyed, trying to rein in you wild imagination what later meant.

"C'mon, we'd better answer to his call." And with that he crawled to the end of his bed. You took a deep breath, trying to calm thunder in you chest before following him out of the door.

"Here bro", Sans waved his hand lazily at Papyrus in greeting as you descended down the stairs.

"AH, THERE YOU ARE! I BOUGHT SOME NOODLES FOR ALL OF US TO-.. ______, ARE YOU ALRIGHT? YOUR FACE LOOKS A BIT FLUSHED", Papyrus inquired with worried furrow adorning his frontal bone.

"Oh hahaha, yeah, sure am, I mean-" Damn, here you go again. You were bad at lying. Especially to someone like Paps. Starting to get flustered, you opened your mouth only to be cut off by Sans. "S'okay bro, just showed them my self-sustaining tornado of trash. It was a bit trashy to look at but hey, it really swept them off their feet if you catch my drift."

"Yeah, it was so fascinating that I got carried away" you piped in feeling relieved, sliding a hand trough your hair to smooth it in order and to calm down your nerves. You were grateful - and a bit jealous - of Sans' quick wit and ability to look nonchalant while you were feeling like a deer caught in headlights. You had to remind yourself you weren't doing anything bad. You just had been welcomed to bone zone by Sans.

Shit.

Feeling embarrassment creeping its way back you decided you had have enough of painfully red face for the rest of the evening and crushed every thought concerning Sans and his touch. You could think about it later. Alone. In your own room. Under your comforter.

HOO BOY.

OKAY.

NOT GOING THERE.

...Yet.

Papyrus looked at the two of you with a blank face and a stare that said he didn't believe you even a second but was gonna drop the subject because he didn't want to get dragged in your shenanigans. With resigned sigh he lifted white plastic bag containing your food and delicious aroma wafted from it to which call your stomach answered with angry grumble.

"Let's tame the beast", Sans grinned in response, leading the way to the kitchen where you spent good half an hour in revered silence, slurping down noodles and feeling drowsy fullness taking you over.

You felt good.

  
Pretty insanely good.

  
Food was awesome. Company was awesome. You wanted Sans. And Sans wanted you.

  
You glanced at said skeleton who caught your stare, .giving you a slow wink.

  
Yeah, it was definitely awesome.

 

\---

 

You couldn't help but wonder.

If his magic was blue.

If his blushing was blue.

Did this mean - taking in consideration his magic's color and Papyrus' unintentional cockblocking (not that there was any time to go all way..) - he was now a literal definition of blue balls?


	2. Angst and one-liners

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans comes to was his clothes and laundry day turns into a angsty but enlightening experience for both of you. With some dorky one-liners.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Sans was filled with angst and determination to make you smile. Stupid, sexy Sans.'
> 
> Welp.
> 
> It wasn't supposed to be this angsty but things happened and I needed an outlet. Hopefully you can still find your reader in this. If not, treat this ch like there was an oc or something.

Coming in with a full basket of dirty clothes, Sans found you from laundry room, sitting on nearby bench and staring absent-mindedly at washing machine.

  
"You spin me right round baby, right round.." he quipped, balancing the basket on his hip bone and doing a little circle with his free hand's index finger.

  
It seemed you hadn't noticed him coming as you let a surprised noise, turning your head to look at him eyes wide. Registering it as him you turned your gaze back to spinning clothes.

  
"Oh, hi Sans", you greeted with dull voice. Deciding it was odd, Sans quickly loaded nearby washer and after turning on the right program, he walked up to you.

  
"Mind if I sit here?"

  
"Be my.. Jest?"

  
"Gladly." He crinkled his eyes smiling and plopped right next to you, arms not quite touching but close enough to notice usual warm feeling of your soul missing.

  
He had always liked how your soul felt. Like hot cocoa on winter afternoon, fluffy blanket you would wrap yourself around to watch your favorite series, baby's laugh after you tickled their tummy... How it would burn hot like a thousand suns if you got angry or shine blindingly like a beacon when you felt happy, attracting humans and monsters alike.

  
Now it felt cold and hazy, barely beating.

  
And it made him nervous. 

 

And usually you would have made a jab about him doing mundane chores.

  
For a while you two were quiet, listening the hum of machines.

  
"So, what's bothering you?"

  
"Do I look like something is bothering me?" You said rather bitterly and furrowed your brows.

  
There was an edge in your voice that made Sans flinch in surprise and you took notice of that, instantly looking apologetic.

  
"Sorry. Nothing is wrong, just- oh scratch that. I'm not okay", you sighed, corners of your mouth twitching "things happened, I guess. Haven't felt too good for a few days."

  
"Things, huh", Sans repeated in contemplating voice, leaning back to rest against wall behind him, silently urging you to go on.

  
"Ah, yeah. I mean, I-" you trailed off, uncomfortable feeling flashing across your face. It really seemed like a hard subject for you to talk to. "Hey kid, you don't have to share if you don't feel like it, really, no pres-"

 

"No no no. It's not like I don't want to share" you denied shaking your head, "it's more like I'm not used to people to care about me like this and ask how I'm doing." You waved your hand around, gesturing nowhere in particular.

  
Then you shaked your head again. "Okay, I didn't mean that either. I know that I have a family I can trust in, I have friends who would stick through thick and thin with me. But if you had asked me, let's say, a year or two ago? ...Do you really want to... Hear this?" It seemed like you were struggling with your words, like every syllable out of your mouth required a great deal of work.

 

"Only what you want to tell me."

  
"Sit tight because this is going to be a long ride and I think I need to ramble so that you know where I'm coming from and all, are you okay with that?"

  
"Shoot."

  
"Okay, so. Uh. In the past I didn't trust anyone and I mean everyone in my life. My dad was - is - an alcoholic. Don't get me wrong, he wasn't violent or anything, he just wasn't there. He always got drunk at home, alone and looking like the whole world was on his shoulders. And then he would pass out, sometimes at living room, sometimes at garage. When he wasn't drinking, he was pretty funny and lively. You know, he likes cracking puns too!" You smiled at the memory it brought but it vanished all too quickly. "All of my mom's energy went for managing him, keeping up pretence that everything was okay. And there was my little sister I had to take look after, since my much older siblings had already left home." You took a deep breath, rubbing your temples in slow motion.

  
"I remember having this huge pressure to be a good kid, so I learned to take care of my shit alone. I couldn't bother my parents. Felt like they were already dealing with a lot, they didn't need to deal my burdens on top of that. When I was bullied by older girls in elementary school? Ignored it and learned to play alone. Dad broke his promise not to be shitfaced while mom was away, frightening my sister? I yelled at him, lectured him crying my eyes out and then I tucked him in bed to sleep his drunkenness away. I was 9 at the time. He always broke his promises when alcohol was involved. There was few times too many my sister and I had to go to sleep at our uncle's, my dad's brother, home because he was unable to take care of us. You know, it always felt like we were just put to live together, that we were pretending to be something we were not.  
     By the time I went to middle school, I smiled like it was the only thing I could do even though- even though almost every night I wished I wouldn't wake up in the morning so that I wouldn't have to deal with shit at home and at school anymore", you turned to look at Sans with lopsided grin, watching carefully for his reaction.

  
Sans stared at you blank look on his face, unsure about how to react such news. You had always seemed so bright and happy he hadn't thought you had dealt with something like this. And it suddenly dawned to Sans that you trusted in him a great deal - opening up about painful past wasn't a small feat to private person like yourself. Feeling something clench around his soul, he steadily hold your gaze, nodding in confirmation that he listened.

  
He would be there for you.

  
Seemingly satisfied whatever you had seen in Sans expression you continued. "Right. I absolutely hated being weak", you said rubbing and occasionally grasping your tights "crying was weak. Depending on others was weak. Sure, I made some friends at middle school but at the same time I felt so lonely, despite those around me never gave me any kind of sign that they would leave. I was so convinced that everything is fleeting, that everything would shatter if I get too attached and it would hurt. I felt like I was suffocating and I didn't know a way out. So when my parents divorced because my dad had cheated with his now wife, I was so glad. Angry because he hurt my mom but at the same time I was so damn happy, I thought everything would be alright now. I would be okay now. But does it ever go like that?"

  
Sensing it was more of a rhetorical question, Sans crossed his arms. Here you were, relying him, telling him something that clearly hurt you and he wanted to comfort you but didn't know how. He felt helpless.

  
Sans had regarded you as his good friend for a while now but you were his only good _human_ friend. Frisk didn't count because they were a kid and with kids things weren't as complicated as it was with adults.

  
Damn this adulting business.

  
Frisk would have sat on your lap, comforting until you felt better and then said something flirty while shooting finger guns at you.

  
Should he hug you? Were you in a stage it wouldn't be awkward as hell? Sometimes Sans wished he'd be more open, like his brother Papyrus who would just scoop people into crushing bear hugs and swing them around like potato sacks (okay, well, that was impossible for sans due his height but that's irrelevant). So he proceed to keep his arms crossed to be safe not to weird you out.

  
"Did you.. Interact with your father after divorce?" He cringed internally at the question. Was it okay to ask that? What if he made you feel worse with his prying. "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer."

  
"Nah, it's okay. You know, my parent's were together almost 30 years but they didn't marry out of love. It was kind of forced upon them because my mom accidentally got pregnant with my big brother and having an illegitimate child was a big shame, especially in a little town where I grew up. Thank god time has changed things. I sometimes wonder why they were together so long, mom said love came in later but I wonder... But now I'm happy for both of them, they both found someone they really love. And to answer to your question, sure, I hated my dad for awhile for cheating mom. But I got over that, mainly because my mom said she had forgiven him and hate would only eat you alive."

  
"Your mom sounds like a lovely person."

  
"She is. She has her flaws and she isn't as innocent as I may have made her out to be. But I like to think that flaws only makes us more human, makes it easier to cope. And I have always been quite a mom's kid, always clinging around her leg like a little monkey."

  
You gave Sans a small smile which he returned. But again it didn't last long as you returned being apathetic, staring at washing machines.

  
"For a long time I denied needing help, that I needed to talk things out with someone. I was so sure I didn't need therapist or something because I had always managed to solve things on my own. I thought I was being strong. Hah", you left a self-deprecating laugh and sniffed, tears pooling around corners of your eyes.

  
Sans didn't know how to deal with crying humans. In panic he took your hand, forgetting his earlier ruminations about awkward skinship. Entwining your fingers, he gave your hand a gentle but firm squeeze. For a good measure, he placed his second hand on the back of your hand.

  
You looked surprised but it soon turned into a look of appreciation.

  
"Heh, your hands feel nice. Dry and cool. I feel faint drumming though, is it magic or something", you choked, looking at your hands, eyes misty with unshed tears.

  
"Yeah, it's magic and something", he gave you a small, comforting smile while rubbing soothingly your hand with his thumbs. He could see the tension drain from your shoulders, feeling strangely happy he was able to do that to you.

  
"I have been kind of running away, changing schools and cities, lived by planning a year or two ahead of me. But now for the first time ever, I'm in a stable job and no specific plans whatsoever about future and I'm so fucking scared. So scared that I started to see a therapist and she said that it's because I have lived a turbulent life where I consider drama and chaos and constant changing as a normal thing and when there's none, I get out of my comfort zone. Happy life freaks me out, can you believe that?"

  
You bit back a sob, tears starting to run down your cheeks.

  
"Now that I don't have to be in 'fight or flight'-mode all the time, my body is giving in. My panic attacks have worsened, I've been sick more, I wake up many times during night and list would go on and on. And top of that my dad called yesterday. He was drunk and said he had money he could give me if I go see him. Who the hell does he think he is?!"

 

You half-yelled the last sentence and cheeks reddening you hang your head, mumbling a low 'sorry'.

  
It was painful for Sans to see you like this. He felt irrational anger so unlike him building inside and he tried his best not to let it show on his face. You obviously cared about your dad so he had to have done something right? Stomping it back where it came from because losing his cool wasn't an option right now, he quietly waited for you to calm down enough to continue.

  
"Does he think that I only go see him for money he sometimes gives me out of blue? Or does he do that out of guilt he put me through, trying to buy my affection? I tought I finally had a father when they divorced and I didn't see him drunk. I tought he had realized how his drinking had made me feel. Or was I just being a blind, hopeful fool that he had magically stopped now that I wasn't around", you looked at Sans, eyes pleading and red from crying, hand crushing Sans' own.  
You unceremoniously wiped your nose on your free arm, sniffing.

  
"I'm sorry you had to see me like this."

  
"There's nothing you should apologize. There's nothing wrong to hope the best from people we love", Sans hesitated a little before bringing his other hand to cup your cheek, wiping away tears with his thumb.

  
Hope.

  
He had this tiny flicker of hope that resided in his soul. And he wanted to crush it. _Didn't he already give up long time ago?_

  
Welp. You weren't the only one having a crisis.

  
He had one at his hands too. Had had a long time.

  
All those years underground, after so many resets, had left him shattered.

  
A broken husk of a skeleton he used to be.

  
Though he wasn't entirely sure who he had even been back when innocence wasn't still lost to him (and he wasn't talking about those, uh.. _monster magazines_ he had under his bed at the time, nope).

 

But he didn't care about it. Sans gladly gave up any naivety he had left, so that Papyrus wouldn't have to lose his. He was like a ray of sunshine, always believing the best of everyone. Call him selfish but Papyrus made him a better person. Believing in him when he all he wanted was to curl up into a little ball and disappear, grabbing his hand and hoisting him up when he didn't want to get up.

  
He painfully remembered when days had only been filled with science, researching a way to leave underground, taking care of Paps and...

  
Sans furrowed his brows. It felt like he was forgetting something.

  
Massaging the bone between his eyes with his free hand he gave up trying to remember and let the thought slip away, concentrating on his surroundings to clear out his head.

  
He would do anything to protect Papyrus.

  
And Sans would protect him.

  
And now he would protect you too.

  
"What do you want to do?"

  
"I don't know. When you are an alcoholic like my father, you can't drink even a little. There's this saying that if 'you give an inch, they'll take a mile', meaning if he drinks any alcohol, it isn't gonna be just a bottle or two once in a while. But I feel that if I say something about his drinking, how I really feel about it, I'm gonna hurt him. Bad. And that's scary, you know? But I can't smile and pretend to ignore it. Not anymore."

  
Sans smile faltered for a second as that triggered more unpleasant thoughts in him.

  
Smile and pretend.

  
He had always put a wide grin on his face, cracked pun after pun to anyone willing to listen. Not that he didn't enjoy making jokes, far from it - he love to see reactions, how one tried their best not to laugh or how someone groaned in frustration or let out a hearty guffaw... Back in the underground he even had had his own stand-up show at MTT's restaurant. Joking made him feel alive, connected to those around him, kept him rooted. Like he was part of something bigger than just himself.

  
But he couldn't remember the last time he'd let someone to see behind his everlasting smile. He had to have everything in control, keep things in reins, not to let Paps know, keep tabs on humans... His white pinpricks dimmed as he stared at your sunken profile.

  
Luckily you were deeply absorbed in your own world to notice Sans was distracted and this gave him time to sort out of his thoughts.

  
He was so tired.

  
Living in the underground, only time when he felt safe enough to sleep was when he was napping outside at his hot dog stand, surrounded by people and noise. The bustling of monsters would lull him in sleep because then he could relax, be reassured that everyone were alive and okay. But when he was alone, when everything was quiet and sleeping, things went south.

  
Helplessness and fear had accumulated over time resulting horrid dreams that terrorized him every other night, kept waking him up over and over again. He never could really remember what was happening in those dreams but the feeling of losing everything he hold dear.

  
In nights like that, panic strangling his throat and feeling like the walls of his room would crush him, he would stare at ceiling in the darkness of his room, trying not to claw his face in frustration realizing he had to wake up in the morning.

  
' _If not for his sake then for Papyrus'_.'

  
His soul clenching in pain behind his rib cage, he would continue to stare at the ceiling until he heard muffled shuffling coming out of his brother's room. Only then he allowed himself to close his eyes again and drift to nothingness.

  
Where that fear came from, Sans was pretty sure not every timeline had been as good as the present.

  
Being as smart as him, one could easily notice how some things weren't adding up and that Frisk was in center of all of it. But when he had tried asking them about it, Frisk had clammed up and Sans stopped trying, scared that he would wake up only to realize time had resetted again, not having a slightest clue how things wold play out this time. So he didn't dare to feel anything.

  
He was so fucking tired.

  
After barrier broke he thought everything would be okay now. He didn't know if they had ever gotten this far as going above but his brother had been so exited, explaining starry-eyed how he was going to buy that race car at last and he didn't have a heart to be a downer, not when Paps was like this.

  
Happy ending and syrupy hugs for everyone. But it was like panic had soaked deep down to his marrow, refusing to let its icy grip go. Bastard.

  
Then he had met you.

  
Another ray of sunshine besides his brother, who tried to break the clouds of his mind.

  
He narrowed his eyes ever so slightly when you freed your hand from his to wipe your face, thinking if you had noticed what was going on with him. Were you interested in his well being as he was yours? If you were, you hadn't said anything. But then again, you weren't one to pry if someone wasn't willing to share, that much he was pretty sure of after spending so much time with you.

  
You waited for people to come to you, willing to lend an ear if needed. They had caught Sans few times staring into space, whole world weighing down on him and all you did was to give his shoulder a gentle squeeze. And Sans appreciated that.

  
He had never felt desire to talk things trough with anyone but now the need was building inside of him.

  
Sans blinked in surprise. Since when he had started to feel comfortable enough that he could share something so personal like feelings with you when he couldn't do it with his other friends (and Paps was simply out of the question).

  
But first things first, he wanted to make you smile. To make your soul feel warm again.

  
Time to Frisk.

  
Sans cleared his throat to get your attention.

  
"Do you know what my shirts are made of?"

  
You eyed Sans, unsure where he was going with this.

  
"Boyfriend material." Wiggling his eyebrow ridges in exaggerating manner to let you know he was joking. You snorted.

  
"I was feeling a little off today, but you definitely turned me on."

  
"Sans, are you shooting pick-up lines at me?" You asked amused, voice tad raspy from crying.

  
"Guess what I'm wearing?"

  
"A shirt made of boyfriend material?"

  
"The smile you gave me."

  
"So cheesy", you said flatly but gave him a huge, dazzling smile anyway. Sans wondered fleetingly if it was faulty lightbulps that made the room seem brighter but he quickly resumed to what he had decided to do. More lines to make you smile.

  
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber."

  
"Baby, I might not be sriracha sauce, but I sure will spice up your life."

  
"Roses are red violets are blue I didn’t know what perfect was until I met you."

  
Sans gave you a hearty, exaggerated wink to wich you finally let a loud laugh, doubling over. Burying your face in your hands, you peeked Sans trough your fingers.

  
"Please stop, old man, those pick-up lines are making my very heart tremble."

  
Sans gasped in mock horror.

  
"Old man?! I'm a fine skeleton in his prime!"

  
"Pfft, yeah right, you aren't exactly what we call well preserved."

  
"Damn it. Do you think there's something to save yet?"

  
"I guess I could find some creams for your wrinkles, gramps, but no promises", you snickered, leaning back to the wall.

  
"....Do you really see me as an old man?"

  
You looked at Sans form corner of your eye. "You certainly are older than me. A lot. When were you born exactly, the middle ages? And always calling me kid, I had to get back at you."

  
"Oh, I see."

  
"Oh, come on, don't give me that pouty look, you make feel like I did something bad here."

  
"Perish the thought", Sans sniffed "Let the old man alone with his crossword puzzles and a need to shake his fist at teenagers. Welp, and if you could go and buy ketchup because my old, shaky bones are aching so bad."

  
"How on earth you managed to turn this around against me?"

  
"Ohh, you, no respect at all. Back in my day..."

  
"Okay okay, I'm sorry. Jeez", you let a short laugh. "I won't call you old anymore."

  
"That's the spirit, kid."

  
Silence ensued again but this time it was lighter, happier. More open. Feeling a surge of happiness tingling through his spine, Sans quickly stuffed his hands inside his jacket's pockets. Sans felt like wrapping himself in a fluffy blanket and drink some hot cocoa again. And he liked it.

  
Fiddling with a ketchup package deep inside his pocket, Sans opened his mouth

  
"_____."

  
"Hm?"

  
"Can people change?"

  
You stared at him, wondering where that question came from but he refused to meet your gaze, eyes directed to the floor.

  
"Well", you said slowly. It felt like he had asked something very personal and you didn't want to ruin this moment by giving a hasty answer, so you contemplated for a while.

  
"Yes. I strongly believe so. But only if the person wants to. You can't force someone, the want to change have to come from inside. Because you are the only one who can take responsibility of your happiness."

  
Sans now turned to look at you. "I think that if someone wants to change, they need to say out loud what they really want, so that they know what they are going for. It doesn't have to be anything big and you may stumble and trip along the way but you need to know where are you going. No one else is going to do it for you", scratching your chin, you gave him a warm smile.

  
"What if they don't know where they want to go?"

  
"Like I said, stumble and trip. It could go like 'I really like seeing people smile so I'm going to think of puns to share with them' or 'I'm gonna plant flowers this year because I like to watch them grow' or something like that at starters. Nothing is too insignificant if it makes you happy."

  
"Puns, eh."

  
"Puns are always a good option."

  
"Heh. Hear, hear."

  
You let out a long sigh. "Look at me here, spewing zen shit all over and giving advices I can't seem to follow myself." You let out another sigh hearing the washing machine peep and rising up to your feet, you gave Sans a thankful smile. "I think I have to talk with my father at some point, even though I'm so scared I feel like throwing up. And hey", you said softly, unable to look at his face "thanks for listening. It means a lot."

  
"Anytime."

 

\----

 

Later in the evening, laying on his bed hands tucked behind his skull, Sans was thinking.

  
He didn't know if this was a good idea.

  
He didn't know if you wanted to hear him out because come on, you had your on problems to deal with.

  
He was scared but at the same time he felt the strong urge to start getting things out of his chest, unlike anything he had felt before.

  
Feeling resolved, he dialed your number but then stopped, his thumb hovering over the green call button. Was he really sure? Sans stared at his phone's screen, feeling a little bit nauseous. His mind raced and Sans could feel anxiety building behind his rib cage.

  
What if you-

  
No.

  
He would do this.

  
Mentally kicking his bony butt, Sans pressed the button and brought the phone to his non-exictent ear. He didn't have to tell you everything. Not at once anyway.

  
_Baby steps, Sans. It's going to be fine._

  
"Sans, sup."

  
"Hello Sans, what a nice name you have."

  
"I know. So, why this late night call? And where's your usual knock knock jokes?"

  
Sans was quiet for a moment.

  
**_He would do this. He would fight for his happiness._ **

  
He wanted you to understand him, to help him become a better person. Whatever that meant.

  
He would start trying once again.

  
"Hey, do you wanna hear a story..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://warblerjam.tumblr.com/

**Author's Note:**

> FYI If you spot (more likely you will spot) grammatical errors, english is not my main language. Not even second. But I'll try my best to improve!
> 
> I post fanart and other stuff on [my tumblr](https://warblerjam.tumblr.com/)


End file.
